Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(607): View more from New York

To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.

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(714): View more from California

Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES

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(248): View more from Michigan

Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?

(810): View more from Michigan

That you did

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".

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