Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING