Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
