I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize