no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I just got carded by a ten year old.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize