If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
