It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize