id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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