Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
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