Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
