Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
