Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Randomize
