I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
