I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
