i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize