I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Randomize