i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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