that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Randomize
