so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
