We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
