we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
