i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
