It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
