ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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