Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
