i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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