He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
