The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
false alarm, still single
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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