Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
