Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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