she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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