Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
