My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
