I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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