it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I think I have vodka in my lungs
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I have peed in a lot of sinks
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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