Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Reggie can tackle my bush.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
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