A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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