We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
The beer is more important than you right now.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Randomize
