hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
