Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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