Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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