Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
