I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
