im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize