so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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