We're facebook friends in real life
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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