i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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