8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
no, he came in my armpit
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
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they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
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NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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