Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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