Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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