You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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