all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
